Have you ever wondered why you have no problem meeting a work deadline but can’t seem to hold yourself accountable to keeping that date with the treadmill? Have you ever noticed how some people just seem to take orders and execute, while others need to ask a million questions before taking action? Do you know someone who never compromises on commitments and always holds up their end of the bargain without fail? Do you know anyone who ALWAYS has to go against the grain– even when it appears really, really unnecessary?
These tendencies aren’t accidents. They’re part of a a simple, yet deeply-researched framework that has the power to help us better manage ourselves and reach our goals faster—and give us insight about how to influence those around us to do the same.
If you’ve ever wondered, “How do I get people—including myself—to do what I want?” Then this sugg-jess-tion is for you!
sugg-jess-tion #11: The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin
Gretchen Rubin is one of today’s most influential and thought-provoking observers of happiness and human nature. Her latest book, The Four Tendencies, breaks down the four primary ways in which people respond to expectations– both external expectations (a deadline, a “request” from a sweetheart) and internal expectations (sticking to an exercise routine, keeping a New Year’s resolution).
- Upholders respond readily to outer and inner expectations
- Questioners question all expectations; they’ll meet an expectation if they think it makes sense–essentially, they make all expectations into inner expectations
- Obligers meet outer expectations, but struggle to meet expectations they impose on themselves
- Rebels resist all expectations, outer and inner alike
Our Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so understanding this framework allows us to make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress and burnout, and engage more effectively. And, as you begin to think about the people around you through this framework, you might find that you’re better able to understand (and even tolerate!) their differences and quirks, too! 😜
Want to know your Tendency?? Take the quiz HERE and find out now!